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CLASSROOM CARNAGE by Bryn M Parry 2.6 Stars (3 Reviews)    Price verified 2 hours ago

Desperate, and fairly incompetent,Todd Percival is not having a very good week. His downstairs neighbour's night terrors have left him devoid of the substantial period of sleep which is absolutely essential for anyone contemplating a day of teaching Science to some 'less than enthusiastic' teenagers. When his woes are compounded by the double-whammy of his headmaster leaving the sinking ship to do a moonlight-flit to a different continent and the heartbreaking discovery that the love interest he has worshipped (from across a crowded, de-motivated, staffroom) had taken to French kissing a much more desirable male colleague than he, Todd decided to take stock of his present lifestyle/rut. True to his purely sedentary character, Mr Percival decided to tough it out until pensionable age or death (whichever came first). Bizarrely, the latter of this brace of eventualities was soon to rear its ugly, fatalistic, head when our questionable hero suffered a pre-planned, and almost lethal, electrocution event. The perpetrator of this 'full-body ionisation' could have been any one of a legion of suspects who had an axe to grind concerning the clinically unlucky, and slightly charrred, victim. Even with the help of the finest brains of the Merseyside Police Force, Todd was unable to discover the identity of the psychotic mind behind this darkest of deeds (and also the, particularly gruesome, murders of two of his acquaintances). Fearing a follow-up dosage of voltage he took the life-changing, and potentially life-preserving, decision to quit is quasi-career and take a year out to 'find himself' (you'll have to ask him what that means... ) whilst travelling around this beautiful little planet of ours. A catalogue of calamities accumulate in poor 'Percy's' diary entries as he struggled to come to terms with the colourful cultures of his first series of destinations in South America. Unfortunately, but not unsurprisingly, things go terribly badly (and we're talking disastrously ...

Genre: Humor & Satire [x]
Length: 155 Pages (407 KB)
Lending: Not Enabled
Added: Oct 27th, 2020

Rubicon Moment: A Cozy Mystery series (Accidental Mayor Book 1) by Jacie Middlemann 3.0 Stars (2 Reviews)    Price verified 2 hours ago

Have you ever said something you really wish you hadn't? Catherine Wittiken is learning that even what is said in jest... tossed out in a moment of levity... can have real consequences. Her only intention was to get a few laughs... not a few votes... or worse than that... more than a few votes. But that is exactly what happened. And in a single moment her life changed... Then on her first day in her new job as mayor of the small town of Highlands Lake... when Catherine didn't think things could get any worse than the dark and gloomy d├ęcor of her new office... it did. There wasn't much worse than murder. Rubicon Moment is the first book in the Accidental Mayor series... coming soon is Buried Justice.

Genre: Humor & Satire [x]
Length: 233 Pages (1,933 KB)
Lending: Enabled
Added: Oct 27th, 2020

Dr. Horatio vs. the Six-Toed Cat (Tales from the Goose Creek B&B) by Virginia Smith (Harvest House Publishers) 4.5 Stars (71 Reviews)    Price verified 33 minutes ago

This bonus e-only short story is the perfect introduction to bestselling author Virginia Smith's latest series, Tales from the Goose Creek B&B. Set in the years before the Richardsons launch their bed-and-breakfast scheme, the quirky residents of the small Kentucky town are all in a tizzy over the upcoming Fall Festival. Alison, Al and Millie's headstrong daughter, astounds everyone with the news that she's getting married -- in three weeks -- to a Colombian! As her parents frantically try to stop the nuptials, Dr. Horatio, Goose Creek's beloved veterinarian, is determined to solve the mystery of the six-toed kittens that have been popping up all over town. This charming prequel will make you laugh out loud, fall in love with the delightful residents of Goose Creek, and remind you why you love reading.

Genre: Humor & Satire [x]
Length: 88 Pages (699 KB)
Lending: Enabled
Added: Oct 27th, 2020

Fairytales for the Disenchanted by Michelle Belanger (Shadowfox Publications) 5.0 Stars (11 Reviews)    Price verified 7 hours ago

A cursed village whose people would rather go blind than see their truths. A mysterious prophet whose promise of total equality does not end as foretold. A little girl who learns the true cost of plucking a rose. These tales and more are gathered in this satirical collection by Belanger. At turns charming, sarcastic, and incisive, these fractured fairytales explore our "what if's" and "how can we do better's?" Originally published by Shadowfox Publications in 1996. Released for the first time in a digital format.

Genre: Humor & Satire [x]
Length: 63 Pages (1,631 KB)
Lending: Not Enabled
Added: Oct 27th, 2020

Footballers: Featuring Ultimate Lacrosse: The Mistress's Tale (Tales of Gentalia Book 13) by CB Archer 5.0 Stars (2 Reviews)    Price verified 8 hours ago

A cast revisited. A ball played with. A Mistress lacrossed off. Industry Giant, Tornado Tech, has done absolutely nothing this time! This time it is The Mistress who is causing the trouble. She is back to squeeze out her explicit revenge on all the previous protagonists from The Tales of Gentalia Series in this giant mash up. But not all revenge plots are planned equal, and soon all the protagonists you remember (and some you don't) are fighting for their lives in the most devious battle to the death in all of video game history: sports! As the game clock ticks down to annihilation so many questions remain unanswered that they don't even fit in this blurb! There are two questions more important than all questions ever asked before as a hook to entice you to read books, the Mistress's personal questions: My killer boobz look super titacular on this cover, right? Aren't you teh jealous? Warning: Contains sexy situations, secret Ds, and more happy endings than that massage parlour everyone warned you about. You know the one, it is located above that seedy convenience store and is open 24 hours a day. It has a vaguely suggestive name and you've never seen people going in there even though it has open for years. Yeah, that one. While part of a series, this is the only novelette in the series that doesn't work as a standalone story! You really need to read the others to understand what is going on.

Genre: Humor & Satire [x]
Size: 2,773 KB
Lending: Not Enabled
Added: Oct 27th, 2020

Halcyon Nights (The Star Sojourner Series Book 2) by Jean Kilczer (Creativia) 5.0 Stars (1 Review)    Price verified 7 hours ago

After astrobiologist Jules Rammis returns to Earth after saving the Terran colony on planet Tartarus, he hopes to spend some time with his six-year-old daughter Lisa, who has inherited his telepathic skills. Their plans change when Jules is summoned to Halcyon to destroy a Terran ravager: the Dream Czar of Halcyon. Reluctant to take his daughter with him on such a dangerous mission, he soon learns that his new employer will not take no for an answer. But can Jules complete the mission while keeping her daughter safe, and rescue the inhabitants of Halcyon before it's too late? Halcyon Nights is a standalone novel, and can be enjoyed even if you haven't read other books in the series.

Genre: Humor & Satire [x]
Length: 211 Pages (1,908 KB)
Lending: Enabled
Added: Oct 27th, 2020

Dragonblinder: The Lump Adventures Omnibus by Bruce Leslie 3.0 Stars (1 Review)    Price verified 13 hours ago

What sort of man calls himself the Lump? The kind who wants people to mind their own mud-kissing business! Dragonblinder contains the complete, unabridged Lump Adventures, a satisfying, warm-hearted epic fantasy with a few laughs thrown in for good measure. Dragon In The Needles: Thirteen years ago Oliver's father died in a battle against Red Line, the savage dragon that plagued Aardland. Oliver has since grown into a very large man with little ambition, earning him a new name: "The Lump." When Flynn, a glory seeking adventurer, and Meena, a mysterious foreign girl, arrive with news that Red Line has stirred once again, the Lump finds himself reluctantly embroiled in a quest to defeat the dragon. Their journey becomes as dangerous as the dragon when the party runs afoul of beasts, brigands and an abbot named Costello. Dragon In Gallis: What's the worst that can happen when one man's troubles become another land's problem? WAR! The three lands were at peace for over a hundred years until the Lump came along and mucked everything up. Now, the Great Egg stands on the brink of war due to the presence of a blind dragon, courtesy of the Lump (who has a new penchant for calling himself "Dragonblinder"). Just when the big guy found his calling in life, an invasion happened. Some dragons are a serious pain in the rump. Dragon In The Darklands: Just when you think a job is finished, the real work starts! The Lump, Meena, and Flynn embark on a journey to return the hated dragon, Red-Line, back to the Darklands. However, the visit stretches on longer than intended when the party encounters a previously unknown civilization. Meanwhile, back home turmoil abounds as political unrest rocks the three Lands. Will the Lump ever find peace or will he be forever embroiled in his quest? Follow the Lump, Flynn, and Meena as they face down a dragon as well as larger problems facing their fragmented lands.

Genre: Humor & Satire [x]
Length: 394 Pages (2,173 KB)
Lending: Enabled
Added: Oct 26th, 2020

Petectives - A Cat Mystery by Robert J. Smith (Rose Grey Press) 4.2 Stars (52 Reviews)    Price verified 14 hours ago

A missing pet. A gang of criminal pit bulls. Two cat detectives are ready to solve a mystery... Yoshi and Gatsby are two felines known as the Petectives. When they agree to help a pretty young cat find her missing brother, a routine pet investigation goes sour faster than a bowl of milk. To solve the mystery, the cat detectives must face down a gang of vicious criminal pit bulls and the neighborhood dog police. While Gatsby's up to his whiskers in danger and romance, Yoshi puts together the pieces of a puzzle that could rock their community. With enemies at every turn, can Yoshi and Gatsby find the missing cat and shut down a dog fighting operation in time? It's all in a night's work for the Petectives! Petectives is the first book in an animal mystery series that features saucy banter, adventurous animals, and charming dialogue. If you love mysteries or books with animals as the lead characters, then you'll love the light-hearted dip into a world of cat detectives. Buy the book today to find the real culprit in this humorous whodunnit!

Genre: Humor & Satire [x]
Length: 84 Pages (160 KB)
Lending: Enabled
Added: Oct 26th, 2020
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